Elijah’s Birth Story

When I got pregnant with my first baby, I went through a wide range of emotions. I was excited, nervous about the birth, and also found my self “grieving” my youth. It wasn’t going to be just about me (or my hubby) anymore. I knew we were about to embark on a new journey together, one that I felt relatively prepared for in the practical sense, because I had grown up as one of 6 children, but perhaps not prepared for in all the other areas. How would I raise a baby, to become a child, to become an adult- day in and day out. How would this baby learn to talk? To read, to relate to others in a social setting. How could I get this baby through to adulthood relatively unscathed- immune to the mistakes I might make on what is a fast and steep learning curve aka: parenthood.

I enjoyed my first pregnancy- thankfully I didn’t have much morning sickness, and might have thrown up once. I was very tired, which made things difficult because I worked a manual labor job 🙂 Thankfully my husband was my boss, so, he was understanding 😉 I continued to dance until the week before my due date- and all went smoothly for the most part!

My due date was April 30- but my mom wouldn’t arrive until May 2. When she told me she was praying I wouldn’t have the baby until she arrived, I was a little perturbed! These are not the things you tell a very prego mama! My mom got her wish, and I am actually glad that she did. As much as I thought we were “ready” there were little things that my seasoned mother of 6 knew we would want, but didn’t have. She cleaned my house from top to bottom, stocked the fridge, and picked up some things for the recovery that I had no idea about! (we need to talk more about that side to new mammas) Let’s just say I stuffed the ziplock of frozen pads to the back of the freezer. I was 2 degrees away from being mortified at the thought of one of my brother-in-laws finding them upon a hunt for a sundae.

As my due date came and went, I began to feel that pressure that we all feel…  come on body, we are not going to be induced! I had made it clear to my doctor that I wanted to wait until the latest possible time before induction was considered, because I knew the list of interventions/complications that often arise with induction. I spent ALOT of time reading while pregnant, I wanted to know what my options were, so that my husband and I could be informed enough to make decisions about my body and our baby- and not be at the mercy of a doctor on a time line. I also talked to many moms about their birth experience. This suddenly became very interesting to me- and even if I had heard it before, I was all ears. One piece of advise rang in my ears from a close friend ” Childbirth was not the worst pain I have ever felt. As long as I kept breathing, it was manageable. Just don’t hold your breath! Breath…”

Here, it is routine to perform an ultrasound and non-stress test for every week you go passed your due date. My husband and I went for an ultrasound on May 8, just to check on baby and make sure the placenta was still healthy. My tech was very quiet (as usual) and spent a loooong time poking an prodding. I almost peed my pants (no joke) She got up, said “Ok. I am just going to run this over with the doctor and make sure I have everything he needs.” I went pee, and then we waited… and waited. And I started to feel a little nervous. Then, the tech returned and asked us to speak with the Doctor on site (in the grief room no less) GREAT! We looked at each other, and just began to pray. We waited for the Dr. She came in, and explained to us that baby appeared to be losing weight, and they were concerned my placenta was dying. She suggested immediate induction. She called my doctor, and we went straight there.

At this point, we prayed. I cried for a minute, and we put on a strong face for the doctor. This wasn’t what I had planned? My original doctor (who I switched from, because she was now on vacation) was convinced my baby was breech at 36 weeks, and was already planning my C-section. Thankfully- just as I thought, and felt his head was down, and he was not breech. We were so close.

The Dr. greeted me with “So, are you ready to have this baby? We’ll induce you tonight, and you should have a baby by morning!”

“Is it that serious? I want to know that this is what we need to do for baby, and I will do it. But, we already have an induction scheduled for Wednesday? Would it be possible to wait until then, and see if my baby comes on it’s own?”

My Dr. called an obstetrician- and Matt and I prayed some more. He returned, and said that they would wait. “You’ll have this baby on your own! Just don’t do it tonight, because I am going to a concert!” He was joking… I think.

He ordered a non-stress test at the hospital, and we decided to get some lunch first. After all, I hadn’t eaten since before the ultrasound… So we went to Extreme Pita. We ordered our Pitas… and then… “Hun. I think I am having contractions.” “Really? Great!”…. a few minutes later. “We need to go home.” m: “okay.” (he kept eating.) “no… we need to go home now.” We headed to the car, and I tried to eat some pita, so I would have energy. “This is it…” I thought.

I spent several hours laboring at home. Unfortunately I got very nautious. And started throwing up about an hour into contractions. I decided to go into the bath, to try and relax, and ease some of the nausea. Mom would poke her head in between cleaning frantically (even though the house was spotless- I think she had Matt change his shirt so she could wash it), helped me with visualizing, and breathing- and shared some tips with Matt. I was uncomfortable. These were intense contractions, about 5 minutes apart. I wanted to stay home as long as possible, so that I didn’t have to spend much time laboring at the hospital. My goal was 5 cm, but, 7cm would be great!

I had been in true labor for about 3 hrs, and vomiting quite a bit. Matt came in after talking with my mom, and suggested that perhaps, if I was ready, we should head to the hospital. I had tried to keep hydrated, but, wasn’t keeping anything down. Because my mom also threw up in her labors, she suggested that I may need IV fluids, to keep from being dehydrated, which would cause exhaustion before my labor was finished. The drive was only about 7 minutes, and it was 7 minutes too long. I slowly made it through the parkade and up the elevator, and down the hall- with bucket in hand.

When I arrived they couldn’t find my file, because they had been waiting for me to show up for my non-stress test. They decided to check me. 3 cm! Nooooo…. that is what I thought. This is going to be epic! I had already been 1 cm for over a week. The nurse began to say she was sending us home…. and then I started vomiting. She changed her mind. They decided to admit me- and I tried to walk the halls to move things along. Breathing, breathing. I stood. I showered. Matt sprayed my belly with the hot water. I rocked. We danced. I spent more time in the bath. At one point my mom came in with a pile of magazine pictures “what do you want? Baby? Puppy? Lady in the shower?” I took the baby, and tried focusing on the image through my contractions. I found what helped most was to hear the words “Up Up Up Up. Down Down Down Down” In correlation with each contraction. Matt was best at reading me for how each contraction progressed.

Sometimes I cried. I cried to God, to give me a rest- to make the next less intense to than the last. I prayed, I asked for his strength. I leaned on my husband, and he held me up. Each time the nurse checked me, I felt a little bit discouraged. 5cm… 7 cm… 8 cm… 8 cm… I was “stuck” at 8 cm for about 2 hrs. I was standing up, with Matt behind me, my mom, mother-in-law and father-in-law in the room (this wasn’t all planned, but it worked) when a humdinger hit me! Ahhhh…. wooosh! My water broke all over the floor, and it splashed up to Matt’s knees! They tell you your water will be like a slow trickle or leak- let me tell you, it can break like a torrent! The room cheered! “YAY!!! That means baby is coming. Head is coming. You’re doing it!” “I am?” “Yes!!”

Once my water broke, things began to progress a bit more. I remember my nurse coming in at one point “You are managing really well, but I want you to know you don’t have to do this all on your own. There are options to manage your pain…” My mom and mother-in-law rushed in around me “You’re doing amazing Ash! Baby’s almost here!” and that nurse knew not to ask again.

When the nurse suggested we try pushing, I felt stunned “Really?” you mean I won’t be in labor for the rest of my life? I had felt the urge to push for a while, but was not quite fully dilated, so had been panting like a puppy to fight that urge. I put in some good pushes on the “U” chair. My mom suggested the nurse alert the doctor “She comes from a long line of good pushers!” The nurse smirked at my mom- “This is her first baby. She will be pushing for a while.” I decided to push semi-sitting, because my legs were shot after laboring mostly standing for the last few hours. She decided to call the doctor.

I will not forget his messy hair, and just rolled out of bed appearance. “Lets see how we’re doing. Oh wow! Okay! Push!! Baby’s head is right there!!!”

I will never forget how awful that felt. Crowning. I let out a scream! “We can see the head!” Matt began to exclaim with joy and tears! “Your baby is almost here!” Suddenly I was so overwhelmed. My baby? My baby! And I pushed.

“My baby!!!” And there he was. on my belly, quiet. perfect. And I cried and laughed, and we saw our boy for the first time. I couldn’t help but exclaim “My baby. Oh baby. I love you.”

Elijah Simon. My God is Jehovah. He who hears.

And I was so in love in an instant. I sang and laughed, and cried. And adored. Our sweet boy was here, and life would never be the same. It was and is, forever, richer.