It’s official. I’ve survived the first year of parenthood as a mother of 3. How. Did. I. Make. It. ?
I don’t really know the answer, but because this is the internet, I am going to offer my expert advice on how you can make it too. Obviously, because I am a blogger, I am an expert. And a mom. {not a mom because I am a blogger, but an expert. Grammar I banish you on my blog, even though you glare at me!}
In reality if you took a picture of me right in this moment… well you’d know the actual truth. 😉
If you are an expectant mother of 3- it’ll be ok. If you are currently in the trenches of your first year of mothering 3- it get’s better, and you’re doing it! YAY! And if you have made it through- WOOOHOOO! And tears.
You see, there is nothing as confusing as a mother’s desire for her children to gain independance, while wanting her children to remain itty bitty newborn bundles of cooing, sleeping, nursing squishiness. I haven’t quite figured it out yet. All I know is that this last year has whizzed by, and I think I have about a handful of photos with our daughter. She is our third baby, and our only daughter… and- I took lots of pictures of her, but there aren’t many of us together. Which leads me to my first tip:
1. Ask people to take your picture. Even if you aren’t wearing make up, or a bra. Even if you feel like a nuisance. Feel good about documenting this year- so maybe you can remember some of it.
2. Don’t feel guilty that you may not have stunning newborn photo sessions to look back on, because the first 3 months of your baby’s life whizzed by, and you were too busy trying to feed the pack of wolves called your children. Be content that something is better then nothing, even if it’s a sub par camera gallery.
3. Be prepared to say the phrase “Shhhhhhh. The baby is sleeping” In a whisper yell at least 1,299 times. To your children. {and others who will remain nameless}
4. Accept that you can’t get out the door in 10 minutes. or 20 for that matter. Be prepared that your get out the door routine will take a minimum of 30 minutes, and will usually include changing your baby’s diaper and nursing him or her at least 10 minutes after you were meant to leave.
5. I have completely surrendered grocery shopping to my husband. This may be one of my number one tips for momming it up with more then 2 children. Let’s be honest- where do the groceries even go when you have 3 kids peppered through out your cart. There just aren’t enough arms. If indeed you do decide to brave the grocery store- bring a wrap, snacks, and nurse the baby before you go in. Just trust me. Oh and be prepared to visit the bathroom at least twice, and don’t forget some kind of treat to bribe your children. And know that you will probably forego the bottom third of your list because your baby is DONE. Also, try to shop at a grocery store that has a coffee bar and free cookies for the kids- which you will visit near the END of the trip when the children are getting rammy.
6. Make lists and let your husband do the grocery shopping.
7. Sleep may come and go. But be prepared that you will be tired.
8. Dry Shampoo is a gift from heaven, and will keep you feeling at least a little bit like a presentable human. That and mascara… and under eye concealer.
9. People will say “WOW you have your hands full!” I still don’t know what to say in response.
10. People will saw “WOW you like tired!” to which it is probably best to reply “I am.”
11. Don’t leave the house if your baby is determined to scream his or her head off.
12. Leave the house. Just go anywhere. Drive.
13. If you have a child over the age of 5 teach him how to make coffee. Honestly, I think my husband is a genius and I send him kisses forever.
14. Be prepared for lots of crying, and sobs- some of which will be coming out of your own unbrushed teeth mouth.
15. If no one has clean socks or underwear, just go to the store and buy a 10 pack. For realz. Aint no body got time for sorting mismatch socks. By you I mean your mom or your husband.
16. Sleep. Lol. I’m kidding. With our first baby I was basically staying at a sleep resort… I’d fall asleep to Ellen every morning. And proceed to nap with my baby. When you have 3 kids, you don’t really nap and amazingly need less sleep… it must be all the coffee. Maybe you can sneak away and get a nap in because of the evil television once in a while.
17. Drink Coffee. But not too much.
18. People will come over when your house is messy, and your children are dirty… thats ok. Otherwise you may never see your friends. Chances are they can take it, and they will just love you more for it. And if they start cleaning the dishes in your sink, or bring you supper, just smile and say thanks.
19. You’re officially outnumbered, so all the things you might have done with your other babies- like reading them stories, changing their clothes every day or bathing them more then once a month could be out of the question. I am half kidding and half not- it’s pretty much family survival. What is a hair brush? Or a blow dryer? Coffee stops not through the drive thru? I don’t know what you’re talkin about.
You’re gonna make it, and you will even have some fun along the way! I pinky promise. Sometimes the more kids you have, the less help people think you need- because you have done it all before! This is true, and some days it really isn’t true… just know you aren’t alone. It’s hard, and crazy, and lovely, and sometimes you just have to laugh otherwise you’d cry. Be sure to kiss your hubby and ask for hugs. These days in our house, the baby is the easy one- our older kids are the ones keeping us on our toes and forcing us to take trips to emerg.
-Miss Ash
oh i laughed out loud for more than a couple of these…. you hit it right on the nose!!
😀
Oh Ash I loved it! I guess some could argue I am only having my second, not third, since my stepdaughter is not technically the fruit of my womb. However, I would argue against it because she is with us primarily and goes to traditional school which has such a rigid schedule an d expectations. I will say she is a huge help and a huge blessing! I know she will willingly help with either Max, or baby Eeston when he gets here. It actually makes me feel a little better thinking of that because she will be able to allow me some of those moments toddler Max will need when only Momma will do. And I plan to teach her to make coffee this weekend when she returns home for the rest of the summer.
I’m 1-5 weeks away from mothering my family of 5. Pretty exciting, exhausting, and honestly unreal. I always wanted to be a wife and mom and before k met W I just didn’t know if it would happen. I love being a mom. Laundry isn’t fun but it reminds me of all the littles and the bigs God has entrusted to me. The stains I remove represent meals we shared. The dirt represents all our adventures. And when I find my daughters clothes I know weren’t actually dirty but ended up in the basket so she didn’t have to put them away I see a 9 yr old me that did the same thing and I feel connected to her through it.
Good read! I enjoyed it!
Oh I am glad you enjoyed it! I am sure you will make the transition to 3 ever so well- and yes, your daughter will be such a help! E is 7, and is so helpful with the baby… G is also, though not quite as trustworthy in his little boy excitement 😉 Love your perspective on things- like laundry. Praying for rest in the weeks ahead, and patience too! Blessings!
too funny and yet so true and full of wisdom ??✨?✨?
I LOVE #15! And have also been on the receiving end of #18 several humbling times…To a mom of one, this is like reading a scary story..no, i’m kidding..but it is cool to apply and recognize many of the things that all parents do on a daily basis. You make me feel normal! I love you!