Several months ago I got the most precious email after casually mentioning that we would one day like to have a piano on the wall leading up the stairs. Well, several weeks ago this beautiful piano was gifted to us from a very dear couple to me. I grew up tinkering on this piano as a girl, and passed it many times in my life. When it was set up in my living room, and I watched my own kids press it’s keys I got very emotional.
When the heart goes through trauma, it is interesting what the mind does to help one cope. I can honestly say that since my dad passed away, it is as though a bomb went off, separating the life before and the life after. Because of the timing- I was 19 years old entering adulthood, and got married within a year- the landscape of my life changed dramatically in a very short time. I have always been known to have an amazing memory, but I genuinely have had a hard time connecting with the memories before my dad died. I believe this is an effect of being the one to have found my dad, carrying the burden of knowing his death had happened- and having to be the one to deliver the terrible news to my family. I have resisted wanting to believe that my dad’s death could have such a profound effect on who I am, and the way I lived my life afterwards- wanting to cling to the effect of LIFE, not death. Yet as time has gone by, how can it not effect me- it has, whether I have wanted to admit it or not.
A very heavy sentiment in relation to a piano, I know. But you see, hearing the sound of that piano in my home, seeing it on that wall- it is a promise. It is proof of the amazing people God has put in my life to bring me through the darkest valleys. Chris and Deborah nurtured me as a child, spoke life into my being, and then opened their home, their ears, and their hearts to me in the wake of my dad’s death. They also loved and knew both of my parents well, and our family as a family- before the trauma. This piano brings me joy and reminds me of the faithfulness of God.
It is over 100 years old, and is a restored antique. It is now a part of the story of our family and we are a part of it’s story. I am so thankful to have it in our home, and be witness to the music that will be born upon it’s keys. Matt and I both sing, he plays the guitar, but we have longed to have a piano to tinker with. Music is in our DNA, and that of our kids. What a gift.